Thursday, May 24, 2007

How much can you tell your children

Last Saturday, I went running with the engagement manager I have been working with on one of my projects. She is preparing for a marathon and I am a retiring runner but I wanted her to get some real training since she has only done treadmill runs since arriving here …also to show her where she can run in this part of the world without looking at her back every second and no cars and other things with wheels that crawl and speed round our streets. I was quite happy to find out that the magic has not totally disappeared and also to notice that out door running still has that high adrenalin feeling for me. I did 18 kilometers running fifteen and walking three while my partner ran her entire 20…(hey I am not training for a marathon…used do that much and more in my hay days)…age has nothing to do with it…we are pretty close in that area…just sheer training and fitness. For a while now, I have been doing only 30 minutes here, 45 minutes there and one hour every once in a while on treadmill but I do this 4 – 5 times a week so I am pretty fit for an advancing woman…

Running is great sport, it frees you physically, mentally and emotionally…you can have the time for “you”…it is just you and nature and our running route over looks the ocean…which is even so breathtaking. We started off running and talking right away…after a while all talks will die naturally because the body is conserving all its energy to move the legs forward…and we got talking about family….we work so hard on this project hat we never stop to find out about each other so this has been our only outlet without other listening ears as well. She asked if I have kids …I said I have one who is 6 and soon-to-be 7…she has a boyfriend and marriage is not what they talk about now…she will like to have kids although she is conscious of the advancing age thingy and we talked about the giant strides in medicine towards women who want to have babies later. Then she said that we are definitely taking our time these days with having babies. She said she is 36 years (she looks great for this age…I must say…I could have put her age at 30 or 31) and that her mum had her at 20 ( I think) or 22 and that her mom had two abortions prior.

Something hit me like a lightening…it is either this mother does not want her kids to make the same mistakes she made or she really confides in her kids. It is hard for women to acknowledge these acts let alone tell kids. I was not sure if I would have done that. I am not sure if she should have…but I am not here to judge her either way…Are there things we cannot tell our kids? Put differently, should we tell our kids everything? Will it hurt them or make them hate us or will it really show them how fallible we are and how even after all these…God still made something out of us because He reserves mercies for thousands???

Saturday, May 12, 2007

When Is the Right Time for Love

Heyya all…have missed blogging…been very busy trying to make loads of money…so that I can lie down under the coconut tree in a secluded island and enjoy nature…fresh fruit juice and simply live…any one understand what I mean?

I realized that stranger than fiction piece got a few tongues wagging, a few curios minds thinking and a few people just wondering…hmmm! I cannot help you…remember I said ask no questions?

On my way back from the Queen’s own country a couple of days ago, I decided that I will not day dream or read which is all I usually do on planes, I decided to watch a movie and I chose “Miss Porter”…when I saw that it was Renee Zellweger…I knew I cannot but enjoy it…who will blame me…I only remember her for Bridget Jones diary. While I am sure movie critics will have their say, I think it was a very good movie...nothing new but something that got me thinking. Every woman has (not every…here I go again generalizing) after all there are women who do not think at all ..anyway…most women over the age of 18 most have given this a fleeting thought…when is the right time for love? How do I know when love comes calling? What if I do not feel any butterflies in my stomach…does it mean? All sorts of questions and thoughts that go through our minds as women (may be they go through guys minds as well but they don’t tell).

So when is the right time for love? When I was growing up (believe me, I am done growing up…at least physically...mentally and emotionally? I think I will continue to grow in those dimensions until the 6 feet time), I thought that love just must come and I do not think that one can pass 20 years without falling in love and living happily ever after…guess what yours truly used to feed on then? Mills and Boon…Janet Daily, Carole Mortimer…those were my favorite writers…then I moved on to Danielle Steel and heartbreaks started filling my thoughts but then back to this 20 years thingy. Then I cannot remember when I was twenty truly but I can tell you that love did not come calling…okay I remember love came before then in different forms and even trailed me home and dearest mommy even had a choice. But suffice it to say that I did not move to the “happily ever after” phase. I trudged along finding my feet and exploring the world…in retrospect I was searching for my niche…not sure if I have finally settled that quest by the way.

When is the right time for love…when we have settled our internal, intrinsic quest, found our niche? Or is it when we feel the butterflies and have no clue of the heart aches and labor and sacrifices that love demands? Looking at Miss Porter, (if you have seen the movie)…I am not sure which one it was really…in her case but there was a lesson in that movie or even lessons…go with your heart, believe in yourself, love can be painful, love gives a second chance.

On another note…life gives a second chance for love…is it only when the first love is dead? Does it give when you did not recognize it at first and you walked past?